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Best & Worst ’10: THEO’S TOP 10 OF 2010

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While many would say that this year was ‘slow’ for the horror genre, I would have to firmly disagree. Last year when I was compiling my list of films for my ‘Best Of 2009’, I was having trouble even remembering half the movies I had seen that year. Of course, the top 5 were cemented, but by the time I got past the sixth film on that list things began to get a bit hazy. That was the direct opposite this year as I had to leave out several films that could have easily made the list last year. But alas, there are only 10 spots, and so for all of you gorehounds, big and small, young and old…I give you my look back at the years best films in the horror genre. Read on for the skinny!

Mr. Disgusting (Best/Worst) | Ryan Daley (Best/Worst) | David Harley (Best/Worst)
BC (Best/Worst) | Micah (Best/Worst) | Keenan (Best/Worst) | Theo (Best/Worst)
Best One Sheets | Worst One Sheets
Most Memorable Moments | Top Trailers | Memorable Quotes

THEO’S TOP 10 OF 2010

10. Machete (September 3; Fox)


Slashing its way onto my list of the years best horror films is Robert Rodriguez’s fan friendly, cashed check of a 70s nod Grindhouse film, ‘MACHETE’. The director, who had been promising for years since the flop of his 2007 directed ‘PLANET TERROR’, that he would be adapting the trailer into a major motion picture was thwarted at almost every turn on his quest to bring fans what they wanted. A fun, no holds barred, over the top bloodbath. What they got was an adequately brutal Trejo, an ensemble cast featuring Jessica Alba and Michelle Rodriguez, and Lindsay Lohan dressed as a nun. The results were nothing short of greatness, and while the film may not have broken any new ground, ‘MACHETE’ will forever be one of the most fucking fun cinematic rides I have ever been on.

9. Devil (September 17; Universal)


One of the most surprising films to hit theaters this past year would have to be the Shyamalan produced ‘DEVIL’. Billed as the first film in the ‘NIGHT CHRONICLES’, ‘DEVIL’ was able to take a very simple idea, couple it with some key performances by Chris Messina and Bojana Novakovic, some Hitchcockian direction from Erick Dowdle, and deliver a film that proves once and for all that M. Night is better off staying behind the scenes and letting the new breed take the helm. Claustrophobic, entertaining, funny, and downright creepy, ‘DEVIL’ is a film that goes far and beyond what we have come to expect from a film that carries the ‘Shyamalan’ banner.

8. The Last Exorcism (August 27; Lionsgate)


What is quite possibly the absolute BEST film in the subgenre since ‘THE EXORCISM’ itself, ‘THE LAST EXORCISM’ reminds us of why films of its ilk are so terrifying. Daniel Stamm’s first person account of one man’s venture into his own inner demons only to be encountered by some very literal ones, was able to hand viewers enough red herrings that it was able to keep you guessing until the very end. M. Night take note: this is how you deliver a ‘twist’.

7. Saw 3D (October 29; Lionsgate)


With the largest horror franchise of the new millennium on the ropes after several sub-par installments in recent years, it wasn’t a shock to anyone that the 7th film in the ‘SAW’ mythos would be the franchises’ last. But instead of crawling away with its tail between its legs, ‘SAW’ managed to go out on the highest note of its run since ‘SAW 2’, and also deliver to fans an ending that they deserved. And while we all expected slow torture as we slipped on our 3D glasses, ‘SAW 3D’ left us a cheering mangled mess as we finally reached the end of Jigsaw’s games.

6. Paranormal Activity 2 (October 22; Paramount)


The LAST film I would have predicted would make this list if you had asked me last year at this time – ‘PARANORMAL ACTIVITY 2′ was a sequel that had the odds firmly stacked against it. With a rushed shooting schedule, a tight budget, and behind the scenes turmoil threatening the films’ success, not even the most well learned horror critic could have predicted that Tod Williams’ sequel to the 2009 blockbuster hit would have even been able to count as passable much less be just as good. Thank God for small miracles, aye?

5. REC 2 (July 9; Magnet)


The follow-up to my top film of 2009, ‘REC 2’ manages to be both an improvement upon an established formula, as well as break some new ground on a subgenre that is on the verge of becoming overused. The directing duo of Jaume Balaguero and Paco Plaza manage to weave together a fantastic make-shift follow-up for fans of the first that answers enough questions to sew up the story, as well as create enough new ones to truly begin the next great horror franchise.

4. The House of the Devil (October 30; Magnet)


One part ‘ROSEMARY’S BABY’ and two parts 80s homage, Ti West’s ‘THE HOUSE OF THE DEVIL’ managed to blow film fest viewers worldwide away with its unapologetically simple approach to the horror genre. Fans of classic slow burners won’t help but be impressed by the films kitschy opening, slow roll middle, and mind blowing ending.

3. Frozen (February 5; Anchor Bay)


Adam Green’s out of nowhere hit about 3 skiers stuck suspended in the air and exposed to the natural elements for a week after being forgotten one terrible Sunday night at a ski resort will do for the winter sport what ‘JAWS’ did for swimming. Rarely is a film so simple able to be so damned compelling, but what Green was able to do on a shoestring budget (and cast) is downright admirable. A film that you should search out at all costs, ‘FROZEN’ is yet another brilliant film to add to an already impressive resume for the writer/director.

2. Dread (January 29; After Dark)


This might be the most obscure choice on my list for most, but After Dark Horror Fest’s surprisingly traumatizing (and grisly) expose’ into the darkest depths of humanity, ‘DREAD’, is one of the most overlooked films of 2010. It is possible that it was simply pushed under the rug due to its disappointing predecessors (Here’s looking at you ‘THE GRAVES’.) , but the make-shift cast lead by Jackson Rathbone managed to string together some of the most disturbingly real horror scenes in recent memory.

1. Let Me In (October 1; Overture)


While I will be the first to admit that I was like everyone else when I thought that Matt Reeve’s Americanized remake of the Swedish masterpiece ‘LET THE RIGHT ONE IN’ would be the biggest dud this side of ‘A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET’. the dark pseudo-romance had more heart and depth per frame than an entire episode of ‘THE PACIFIC’. While it might not have been better than its predecessor, the film managed to improve upon a few key plotlines while still being faithful to the source material. (A feat few movies can achieve.) Couple this with some of the best performances we have seen in a horror film in years from Moretz and Smit-McPhee, and you have a modern day genre classic. The only shame in this film is that it went so unnoticed by general audiences who will clamor for the next ‘Twatlight’ installment, but won’t shell out $10s for a true vampire film.

Editorials

What’s Wrong with My Baby!? Larry Cohen’s ‘It’s Alive’ at 50

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Netflix It's Alive

Soon after the New Hollywood generation took over the entertainment industry, they started having children. And more than any filmmakers that came before—they were terrified. Rosemary’s Baby (1968), The Exorcist (1973), The Omen (1976), Eraserhead (1977), The Brood (1979), The Shining (1980), Possession (1981), and many others all deal, at least in part, with the fears of becoming or being a parent. What if my child turns out to be a monster? is corrupted by some evil force? or turns out to be the fucking Antichrist? What if I screw them up somehow, or can’t help them, or even go insane and try to kill them? Horror has always been at its best when exploring relatable fears through extreme circumstances. A prime example of this is Larry Cohen’s 1974 monster-baby movie It’s Alive, which explores the not only the rollercoaster of emotions that any parent experiences when confronted with the difficulties of raising a child, but long-standing questions of who or what is at fault when something goes horribly wrong.

Cohen begins making his underlying points early in the film as Frank Davis (John P. Ryan) discusses the state of the world with a group of expectant fathers in a hospital waiting room. They discuss the “overabundance of lead” in foods and the environment, smog, and pesticides that only serve to produce roaches that are “bigger, stronger, and harder to kill.” Frank comments that this is “quite a world to bring a kid into.” This has long been a discussion point among people when trying to decide whether to have kids or not. I’ve had many conversations with friends who have said they feel it’s irresponsible to bring children into such a violent, broken, and dangerous world, and I certainly don’t begrudge them this. My wife and I did decide to have children but that doesn’t mean that it’s been easy.

Immediately following this scene comes It’s Alive’s most famous sequence in which Frank’s wife Lenore (Sharon Farrell) is the only person left alive in her delivery room, the doctors clawed and bitten to death by her mutant baby, which has escaped. “What does my baby look like!? What’s wrong with my baby!?” she screams as nurses wheel her frantically into a recovery room. The evening that had begun with such joy and excitement at the birth of their second child turned into a nightmare. This is tough for me to write, but on some level, I can relate to this whiplash of emotion. When my second child was born, they came about five weeks early. I’ll use the pronouns “they/them” for privacy reasons when referring to my kids. Our oldest was still very young and went to stay with my parents and we sped off to the hospital where my wife was taken into an operating room for an emergency c-section. I was able to carry our newborn into the NICU (natal intensive care unit) where I was assured that this was routine for all premature births. The nurses assured me there was nothing to worry about and the baby looked big and healthy. I headed to where my wife was taken to recover to grab a few winks assuming that everything was fine. Well, when I awoke, I headed back over to the NICU to find that my child was not where I left them. The nurse found me and told me that the baby’s lungs were underdeveloped, and they had to put them in a special room connected to oxygen tubes and wires to monitor their vitals.

It’s difficult to express the fear that overwhelmed me in those moments. Everything turned out okay, but it took a while and I’m convinced to this day that their anxiety struggles spring from these first weeks of life. As our children grew, we learned that two of the three were on the spectrum and that anxiety, depression, ADHD, and OCD were also playing a part in their lives. Parents, at least speaking for myself, can’t help but blame themselves for the struggles their children face. The “if only” questions creep in and easily overcome the voices that assure us that it really has nothing to do with us. In the film, Lenore says, “maybe it’s all the pills I’ve been taking that brought this on.” Frank muses aloud about how he used to think that Frankenstein was the monster, but when he got older realized he was the one that made the monster. The aptly named Frank is wondering if his baby’s mutation is his fault, if he created the monster that is terrorizing Los Angeles. I have made plenty of “if only” statements about myself over the years. “If only I hadn’t had to work so much, if only I had been around more when they were little.” Mothers may ask themselves, “did I have a drink, too much coffee, or a cigarette before I knew I was pregnant? Was I too stressed out during the pregnancy?” In other words, most parents can’t help but wonder if it’s all their fault.

At one point in the film, Frank goes to the elementary school where his baby has been sighted and is escorted through the halls by police. He overhears someone comment about “screwed up genes,” which brings about age-old questions of nature vs. nurture. Despite the voices around him from doctors and detectives that say, “we know this isn’t your fault,” Frank can’t help but think it is, and that the people who try to tell him it isn’t really think it’s his fault too. There is no doubt that there is a hereditary element to the kinds of mental illness struggles that my children and I deal with. But, and it’s a bit but, good parenting goes a long way in helping children deal with these struggles. Kids need to know they’re not alone, a good parent can provide that, perhaps especially parents that can relate to the same kinds of struggles. The question of nature vs. nurture will likely never be entirely answered but I think there’s more than a good chance that “both/and” is the case. Around the midpoint of the film, Frank agrees to disown the child and sign it over for medical experimentation if caught or killed. Lenore and the older son Chris (Daniel Holzman) seek to nurture and teach the baby, feeling that it is not a monster, but a member of the family.

It’s Alive takes these ideas to an even greater degree in the fact that the Davis Baby really is a monster, a mutant with claws and fangs that murders and eats people. The late ’60s and early ’70s also saw the rise in mass murderers and serial killers which heightened the nature vs. nurture debate. Obviously, these people were not literal monsters but human beings that came from human parents, but something had gone horribly wrong. Often the upbringing of these killers clearly led in part to their antisocial behavior, but this isn’t always the case. It’s Alive asks “what if a ‘monster’ comes from a good home?” In this case is it society, environmental factors, or is it the lead, smog, and pesticides? It is almost impossible to know, but the ending of the film underscores an uncomfortable truth—even monsters have parents.

As the film enters its third act, Frank joins the hunt for his child through the Los Angeles sewers and into the L.A. River. He is armed with a rifle and ready to kill on sight, having divorced himself from any relationship to the child. Then Frank finds his baby crying in the sewers and his fatherly instincts take over. With tears in his eyes, he speaks words of comfort and wraps his son in his coat. He holds him close, pats and rocks him, and whispers that everything is going to be okay. People often wonder how the parents of those who perform heinous acts can sit in court, shed tears, and defend them. I think it’s a complex issue. I’m sure that these parents know that their child has done something evil, but that doesn’t change the fact that they are still their baby. Your child is a piece of yourself formed into a whole new human being. Disowning them would be like cutting off a limb, no matter what they may have done. It doesn’t erase an evil act, far from it, but I can understand the pain of a parent in that situation. I think It’s Alive does an exceptional job placing its audience in that situation.

Despite the serious issues and ideas being examined in the film, It’s Alive is far from a dour affair. At heart, it is still a monster movie and filled with a sense of fun and a great deal of pitch-black humor. In one of its more memorable moments, a milkman is sucked into the rear compartment of his truck as red blood mingles with the white milk from smashed bottles leaking out the back of the truck and streaming down the street. Just after Frank agrees to join the hunt for his baby, the film cuts to the back of an ice cream truck with the words “STOP CHILDREN” emblazoned on it. It’s a movie filled with great kills, a mutant baby—created by make-up effects master Rick Baker early in his career, and plenty of action—and all in a PG rated movie! I’m telling you, the ’70s were wild. It just also happens to have some thoughtful ideas behind it as well.

Which was Larry Cohen’s specialty. Cohen made all kinds of movies, but his most enduring have been his horror films and all of them tackle the social issues and fears of the time they were made. God Told Me To (1976), Q: The Winged Serpent (1982), and The Stuff (1985) are all great examples of his socially aware, low-budget, exploitation filmmaking with a brain and It’s Alive certainly fits right in with that group. Cohen would go on to write and direct two sequels, It Lives Again (aka It’s Alive 2) in 1978 and It’s Alive III: Island of the Alive in 1987 and is credited as a co-writer on the 2008 remake. All these films explore the ideas of parental responsibility in light of the various concerns of the times they were made including abortion rights and AIDS.

Fifty years after It’s Alive was initially released, it has only become more relevant in the ensuing years. Fears surrounding parenthood have been with us since the beginning of time but as the years pass the reasons for these fears only seem to become more and more profound. In today’s world the conversation of the fathers in the waiting room could be expanded to hormones and genetic modifications in food, terrorism, climate change, school and other mass shootings, and other threats that were unknown or at least less of a concern fifty years ago. Perhaps the fearmongering conspiracy theories about chemtrails and vaccines would be mentioned as well, though in a more satirical fashion, as fears some expectant parents encounter while endlessly doomscrolling Facebook or Twitter. Speaking for myself, despite the struggles, the fears, and the sadness that sometimes comes with having children, it’s been worth it. The joys ultimately outweigh all of that, but I understand the terror too. Becoming a parent is no easy choice, nor should it be. But as I look back, I can say that I’m glad we made the choice we did.

I wonder if Frank and Lenore can say the same thing.

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