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Best & Worst of ’10: RYAN DALEY’S TOP 10 OF 2010

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I relish my role as a DVD critic for B-D, especially as a guy who has grown estranged from the once-relished movie theater experience. I deeply respect Mr. D for braving a tweener-packed Twilight screening in order to secure an early review, but these days I’d rather review a movie from the sanctity of my own sofa in a completely empty house. It’s the only way to truly immerse myself in a film. And I know that I’m not alone. There are others out there, silent rebels that have angrily disavowed movie theaters and their obnoxious distractions. And this list of the best horror DVDs of 2010 is dedicated to you, my fellow theater-hating couch potatoes. (Once again, this is a list of DVDs, not theatrical releases. So please try to refrain from giving me shit in the comments for neglecting Let Me In, Buried, or other movies that won’t receive a DVD release until 2011.)

Mr. Disgusting (Best/Worst) | Ryan Daley (Best/Worst) | David Harley (Best/Worst)
BC (Best/Worst) | Micah (Best/Worst) | Keenan (Best/Worst) | Theo (Best/Worst)
Best One Sheets | Worst One Sheets
Most Memorable Moments | Top Trailers | Memorable Quotes

RYAN DALEY’S TOP 10 OF 2010

10. Predators (October 19; 20th Century Fox)


Although not a perfect film, Predators’ ìgame preserveî premise served as an excellent thematic reboot to the franchise. Sure, a puffy Larry Fishburne gets killed off way too early, but there are plenty of righteous fight scenes to go around, and Adrien Brody does his whole growly Bale/Batman thing for 107 minutes, which had to impress somebody, somewhere.

9. Dark Night of the Scarecrow (September 28; VCI Entertainment)


A TV-movie gem from 1981 finally gets the DVD release it deserves. After being executed for a crime he didn’t commit, a small town retard rises from the grave to seek revenge against the posse that killed him. It’s good, cheesy fun, a perfectly shot piece of low budget Americana that still manages to resonate 30 years later.

8. House of the Devil (February 2; Dark Sky Films)


It took two viewingsññmonths apartññbefore Ti West’s slow-burn style really started to grow on me. His homage to 80s horror is too well-crafted, moody, and memorable to dismiss as simply ìboringì. Once I realized that the shitty pacing was on purpose, the flick was finally able to work its old school magic.

7. Frozen (September 28; Anchor Bay Films)



I get a rager for single-setting horror flicks and Frozen takes a high-concept premise to an armrest-gripping extreme. Adam Green’s tale of three friends trapped on a ski lift made me both sweat and shiver in the theater. In a sense, it’s the ultimate survival film. In the process, Green managed to teach Hollywood a valuable lesson: When it comes to wolves, there is no substitute for the real thing.

6. The Killer Inside Me (September 28; MPI Home Video)


Despite its universally appealing white-bread cast (Casey Affleck, Jessica Alba, and Kate Hudson), The Killer Inside Me received a very limited release (17 theaters) and only managed to bank around $200,000 at the box office. You’d think the halcyon 1950s setting would appeal to mystery-loving baby boomers, but perhaps the gut-wrenching violence turned them away. Like Blue Velvet, it’s a disturbing exploration of the evil that lurks just beneath the tranquil surface of us all. A queasily unforgettable movie experience that’s not intended for everyone.

5. Centurion (November 2; Magnolia)


British director Neil Marshall follows up The Descent and Doomsday with this hyper-violent Romans vs. Barbarians spectacle. I’m hard pressed to name a contemporary director who makes movies that are as reliably entertaining as Marshall’s, and Centurion is no exception. Although it’s not technically a horror film, the high-energy battle scenes and gorgeous Scotland landscapes are straight-up eye candy, the blood flies fast and loose, and the bounteous carnage will please even the most unforgiving of horror fans.

4. Shutter Island (June 8; Paramount)


The complaints about the predictability of its twist ending are somewhat warranted, but Martin Scorsese’s madhouse lockdown is all about the journey, not the destination. Oozing the same suffocating dread that defined 1991’s Cape Fearññalong with some truly stunning cinematographyññShutter Island deserves far more respect than its post-Oscars release date would imply.

3. Moon (January 12; Sony Pictures)


Yeah, I know it seems like this one came out ages ago, but I was forced to exclude it from last year’s DVD list due to its January 2010 release date, and it definitely deserves some space here. Itës my favorite film of the 2009 Sundance Film Festival, a thought-provoking piece of science fiction about manës inherent loneliness in the universe, easily on par with superior genre fare like Solaris or Sunshine.

1. (tie) Best Worst Movie and Never Sleep Again (January 12; Sony Pictures)


Kneel and give praise to the Horror Gods, for 2010 was the year of the two best horror documentaries of all time! Never Sleep Again is a four hour love letter to the Nightmare on Elm Street franchise, a doc that leaves no gravestone unturned, covering everything from the vast shittiness of the syndicated Freddy’s Nightmares to the latent homosexuality that seeped through Nightmare Part 2. Whether or not you’re an obsessed fan of the franchise, it’s a film that is impossible to stop watching.

And at this point, I don’t know what more you need to hear about Best Worst Movie. It’s both hysterically funny and genuinely moving, a powerful dedication to bad cinema everywhere. If you still haven’t had your friends over for a Nilbog party, well, then you just ain’t livin’. Put it on your bucket list, stat.

Honorable Mentions

Red Riding, Cropsey, Zombieland, The Book of Eli, The Crazies

Editorials

What’s Wrong with My Baby!? Larry Cohen’s ‘It’s Alive’ at 50

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Netflix It's Alive

Soon after the New Hollywood generation took over the entertainment industry, they started having children. And more than any filmmakers that came before—they were terrified. Rosemary’s Baby (1968), The Exorcist (1973), The Omen (1976), Eraserhead (1977), The Brood (1979), The Shining (1980), Possession (1981), and many others all deal, at least in part, with the fears of becoming or being a parent. What if my child turns out to be a monster? is corrupted by some evil force? or turns out to be the fucking Antichrist? What if I screw them up somehow, or can’t help them, or even go insane and try to kill them? Horror has always been at its best when exploring relatable fears through extreme circumstances. A prime example of this is Larry Cohen’s 1974 monster-baby movie It’s Alive, which explores the not only the rollercoaster of emotions that any parent experiences when confronted with the difficulties of raising a child, but long-standing questions of who or what is at fault when something goes horribly wrong.

Cohen begins making his underlying points early in the film as Frank Davis (John P. Ryan) discusses the state of the world with a group of expectant fathers in a hospital waiting room. They discuss the “overabundance of lead” in foods and the environment, smog, and pesticides that only serve to produce roaches that are “bigger, stronger, and harder to kill.” Frank comments that this is “quite a world to bring a kid into.” This has long been a discussion point among people when trying to decide whether to have kids or not. I’ve had many conversations with friends who have said they feel it’s irresponsible to bring children into such a violent, broken, and dangerous world, and I certainly don’t begrudge them this. My wife and I did decide to have children but that doesn’t mean that it’s been easy.

Immediately following this scene comes It’s Alive’s most famous sequence in which Frank’s wife Lenore (Sharon Farrell) is the only person left alive in her delivery room, the doctors clawed and bitten to death by her mutant baby, which has escaped. “What does my baby look like!? What’s wrong with my baby!?” she screams as nurses wheel her frantically into a recovery room. The evening that had begun with such joy and excitement at the birth of their second child turned into a nightmare. This is tough for me to write, but on some level, I can relate to this whiplash of emotion. When my second child was born, they came about five weeks early. I’ll use the pronouns “they/them” for privacy reasons when referring to my kids. Our oldest was still very young and went to stay with my parents and we sped off to the hospital where my wife was taken into an operating room for an emergency c-section. I was able to carry our newborn into the NICU (natal intensive care unit) where I was assured that this was routine for all premature births. The nurses assured me there was nothing to worry about and the baby looked big and healthy. I headed to where my wife was taken to recover to grab a few winks assuming that everything was fine. Well, when I awoke, I headed back over to the NICU to find that my child was not where I left them. The nurse found me and told me that the baby’s lungs were underdeveloped, and they had to put them in a special room connected to oxygen tubes and wires to monitor their vitals.

It’s difficult to express the fear that overwhelmed me in those moments. Everything turned out okay, but it took a while and I’m convinced to this day that their anxiety struggles spring from these first weeks of life. As our children grew, we learned that two of the three were on the spectrum and that anxiety, depression, ADHD, and OCD were also playing a part in their lives. Parents, at least speaking for myself, can’t help but blame themselves for the struggles their children face. The “if only” questions creep in and easily overcome the voices that assure us that it really has nothing to do with us. In the film, Lenore says, “maybe it’s all the pills I’ve been taking that brought this on.” Frank muses aloud about how he used to think that Frankenstein was the monster, but when he got older realized he was the one that made the monster. The aptly named Frank is wondering if his baby’s mutation is his fault, if he created the monster that is terrorizing Los Angeles. I have made plenty of “if only” statements about myself over the years. “If only I hadn’t had to work so much, if only I had been around more when they were little.” Mothers may ask themselves, “did I have a drink, too much coffee, or a cigarette before I knew I was pregnant? Was I too stressed out during the pregnancy?” In other words, most parents can’t help but wonder if it’s all their fault.

At one point in the film, Frank goes to the elementary school where his baby has been sighted and is escorted through the halls by police. He overhears someone comment about “screwed up genes,” which brings about age-old questions of nature vs. nurture. Despite the voices around him from doctors and detectives that say, “we know this isn’t your fault,” Frank can’t help but think it is, and that the people who try to tell him it isn’t really think it’s his fault too. There is no doubt that there is a hereditary element to the kinds of mental illness struggles that my children and I deal with. But, and it’s a bit but, good parenting goes a long way in helping children deal with these struggles. Kids need to know they’re not alone, a good parent can provide that, perhaps especially parents that can relate to the same kinds of struggles. The question of nature vs. nurture will likely never be entirely answered but I think there’s more than a good chance that “both/and” is the case. Around the midpoint of the film, Frank agrees to disown the child and sign it over for medical experimentation if caught or killed. Lenore and the older son Chris (Daniel Holzman) seek to nurture and teach the baby, feeling that it is not a monster, but a member of the family.

It’s Alive takes these ideas to an even greater degree in the fact that the Davis Baby really is a monster, a mutant with claws and fangs that murders and eats people. The late ’60s and early ’70s also saw the rise in mass murderers and serial killers which heightened the nature vs. nurture debate. Obviously, these people were not literal monsters but human beings that came from human parents, but something had gone horribly wrong. Often the upbringing of these killers clearly led in part to their antisocial behavior, but this isn’t always the case. It’s Alive asks “what if a ‘monster’ comes from a good home?” In this case is it society, environmental factors, or is it the lead, smog, and pesticides? It is almost impossible to know, but the ending of the film underscores an uncomfortable truth—even monsters have parents.

As the film enters its third act, Frank joins the hunt for his child through the Los Angeles sewers and into the L.A. River. He is armed with a rifle and ready to kill on sight, having divorced himself from any relationship to the child. Then Frank finds his baby crying in the sewers and his fatherly instincts take over. With tears in his eyes, he speaks words of comfort and wraps his son in his coat. He holds him close, pats and rocks him, and whispers that everything is going to be okay. People often wonder how the parents of those who perform heinous acts can sit in court, shed tears, and defend them. I think it’s a complex issue. I’m sure that these parents know that their child has done something evil, but that doesn’t change the fact that they are still their baby. Your child is a piece of yourself formed into a whole new human being. Disowning them would be like cutting off a limb, no matter what they may have done. It doesn’t erase an evil act, far from it, but I can understand the pain of a parent in that situation. I think It’s Alive does an exceptional job placing its audience in that situation.

Despite the serious issues and ideas being examined in the film, It’s Alive is far from a dour affair. At heart, it is still a monster movie and filled with a sense of fun and a great deal of pitch-black humor. In one of its more memorable moments, a milkman is sucked into the rear compartment of his truck as red blood mingles with the white milk from smashed bottles leaking out the back of the truck and streaming down the street. Just after Frank agrees to join the hunt for his baby, the film cuts to the back of an ice cream truck with the words “STOP CHILDREN” emblazoned on it. It’s a movie filled with great kills, a mutant baby—created by make-up effects master Rick Baker early in his career, and plenty of action—and all in a PG rated movie! I’m telling you, the ’70s were wild. It just also happens to have some thoughtful ideas behind it as well.

Which was Larry Cohen’s specialty. Cohen made all kinds of movies, but his most enduring have been his horror films and all of them tackle the social issues and fears of the time they were made. God Told Me To (1976), Q: The Winged Serpent (1982), and The Stuff (1985) are all great examples of his socially aware, low-budget, exploitation filmmaking with a brain and It’s Alive certainly fits right in with that group. Cohen would go on to write and direct two sequels, It Lives Again (aka It’s Alive 2) in 1978 and It’s Alive III: Island of the Alive in 1987 and is credited as a co-writer on the 2008 remake. All these films explore the ideas of parental responsibility in light of the various concerns of the times they were made including abortion rights and AIDS.

Fifty years after It’s Alive was initially released, it has only become more relevant in the ensuing years. Fears surrounding parenthood have been with us since the beginning of time but as the years pass the reasons for these fears only seem to become more and more profound. In today’s world the conversation of the fathers in the waiting room could be expanded to hormones and genetic modifications in food, terrorism, climate change, school and other mass shootings, and other threats that were unknown or at least less of a concern fifty years ago. Perhaps the fearmongering conspiracy theories about chemtrails and vaccines would be mentioned as well, though in a more satirical fashion, as fears some expectant parents encounter while endlessly doomscrolling Facebook or Twitter. Speaking for myself, despite the struggles, the fears, and the sadness that sometimes comes with having children, it’s been worth it. The joys ultimately outweigh all of that, but I understand the terror too. Becoming a parent is no easy choice, nor should it be. But as I look back, I can say that I’m glad we made the choice we did.

I wonder if Frank and Lenore can say the same thing.

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