Now that baseball is over we can get back to our snarky bitchy Tuesday night viewing. This week on “Scream Queens” Ariana Grande made a guest appearance as dead Chanel #2, Gigi revealed herself to be even crazier than we thought (yeah, sure you’re not “touched in the head”), Dean Munsch is straight Single White Female crazy, and Grace and Pete continue to be the least interesting part of the show.
We open on a funeral for Chanel #2 (Grande) and Chanel #1 narrating her disdain for the fallen sister. She’s glad she’s dead and she doesn’t care who knows it, especially since Chanel #2 was sleeping with Chad Radwell, who will sincerely miss porking her. After the funeral the Chanel’s gather around a Ouija board to ask Chanel #2 some questions and find out who the killer is. After the board seemingly works, Chanel #2 pegs Chanel #1 as the killer causing the rest of the group, lead by #6, to decide Chanel must die. After all, they are all guilty of being involved with Chad Radwell behind Chanel’s back.
Any episode that features Chanel #4 and #5 predominately automatically makes me smile. I can’t get over how hilarious Abigail Breslin and Billie Lourd are both together and separate. The girls consider various plans to kill Chanel but can’t seem to agree on either grinding up her diamonds and feeding them to her at a sugar party (this is not a thing, I refuse to believe it is) and Breslin’s overly complicated plans crack me up.Any episode that features Chanel #4 and #5 predominately automatically makes me smile. I can’t get over how hilarious Abigail Breslin and Billie Lourd are both together and separate. The girls consider various plans to kill Chanel but can’t seem to agree on either grinding up her diamonds and feeding them to her at a sugar party (this is not a thing, I refuse to believe it is) and Breslin’s overly complicated plans crack me up.
Their plan is foiled when Chanel #2 comes back from the grave in a dream(?) sequence to reveal hell is not all it’s cracked up to be and to warn Chanel what her cohorts are up to. Of course, she confronts them and gains their trust back with material goods in true Chanel fashion. But we all know from the past that these girls are out for blood, figuratively or not, and can’t be entirely trusted to be back on Chanel’s side. My only issue with this sequence is introducing the possibility of supernatural occurrences. I will take the campy attitude and over the top dialogue but I have to draw a line somewhere and that line is introducing the idea of a spirit world that could be a really big plot killer. I’m going to just assume it was a dream and that the Ouija board was being controlled by the Chanels.
After a week off I was happy to join the show again and for me it seemed to be much funnier than the last couple of episodes. It also gave us more background on Dean Munsch, which may have been superfluous to everything else, but I will take any and all extra time with Jamie Lee Curtis. In fact, one of the more clever references I thought was the use of “Beware of Young Girls” by Dory Previn. The song’s title is the title of this week’s episode and comes to a head at the end of the episode with Munsch dancing around to it revealing that she did, in fact, kill her husband because of his affair with former KKT member Feather. Previn wrote the song after her husband had an affair with Mia Farrow, whom Feather looks almost identical to. Curtis is the absolute best part of this show and her tumble down psycho hill makes me smile.
Finally my least favorite aspect of the show, Grace, and Pete. I don’t dislike either character and I certainly don’t understand the hate for Grace’s hats (I mean why? They are just hats…) but these two are extremely uninteresting compared to the rest of the characters. Pete’s Matthew McConaghuey’s accent was entertaining once but using it as a running gag makes me want to punch him in the teeth. Also, are we just going to forget about his former obsession with Chanel and chalk it up to a lazy red herring or will that come back into play?
“Beware of Young Girls” cements what I had been thinking the whole time. This show is not about Grace’s journey to becoming some kind of final girl it’s about the idea of everyone being certifiable. Yeah, it could have been a paint by numbers whodunit with some snark thrown in but it’s focus is on the crazy and absurd which is fine by me.
And speaking of absurd, where is Denise Hemphill? I know most of you hate her, but I’ve been missing her these past few weeks.
Favorite Lines:
“Didn’t you see the movie?”
“The movie Ouija? No! No one did!”
“I don’t trust a girl with a big bush of pubic hair. Makes me think she’s got something to hide.”
*On the subject of hell and the lack of dinosaurs* “We know, Jesus broke in and stole them.”
“I was probably in a bad mood because Adolph Hitler was motor-boating my boobs.”