Movies
BD Review: A Second Opinion on ‘Survival of the Dead’
It’s no secret that I despise George A. Romero’s Survival of the Dead as I wrote this negative review way back in September. After the rash of screenings through TIFF and Fantastic Fest, I started to think I was in the minority, and maybe I still am, but for now it looks as if Bloody Disgusting’s Michael Panduro agrees with me. Below you’ll find his negative thoughts on Romero’s latest zombie opus — and don’t forget to write your own review and tell us what YOU think. I’m dying to know.
What the trinkly fudge just happened!? I feel betrayed, humiliated! This is comparable to something like my girlfriend through 6 years suddenly showing me a lump in her panties and saying she hasn’t been totally honest with me. This feels like when George Lucas butt-fucked a generation with The Phantom Menace. Worse yet, this feels worse than seeing a modern Carpenter or Argento flick!
After sitting through the most ridiculous hour and a half I’ve ever had with the living dead I wanna re-evaluate my entire perception of George A. Romero. I wanna rip out my numerous copies of the dead trilogy (seriously, screw everything after Day), piss on them and set fire to the very memory of ever being a devoted fan. But I’m not gonna do it. Because I remember this exact same thing happening before. It happened when I watched Carpenter’s Ghosts Of Mars and it happened when I watched Argento’s Phantom of The Opera. What the hell happened to these guys in the mid-90s!? Did the drugs stop working or something!? Does talent, judgment and common sense evaporate when you hit 60? I have no idea, but the fact remains that Romero has now conclusively joined the ranks of nonsensical horror-directors who once blew my mind with edgy, relevant and original stories and are now cranking out movies so bad I almost feel sorry for them. The classics are still classics. Question is, how does a filmmaker – a creative artist, if you will – go from greatness to utter shittiness?
I was out there on the frontline defending Land Of The Dead, when it first came out. I thought it was kinda good fun, the production design and acting was kinda ok and the script kinda made sense. But I was wrong, I’ve realized that on repeat viewings. And Diary really sucked, that was apparent first time around. But still it couldn’t have prepared me for the filmic abortion that is Survival of The Dead. I mean, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING works in this film! Every single solitary aspect of filmmaking is flawed to the point that it reeks amateur. This looks like a shitty student film, made not by people with decades of experience, but by snotty teenage stoners wanting to do a huh-huh-zombie-flick. It’s ridiculous, it’s not funny, it just pisses me of. Apart from a monumentally faulty script with everything from valleys of plot-holes, stupid dialogue and scenes that are just nonsense, Survival suffers under poor digital photography that looks horrible on film, clumsy lighting, loose editing and goofy music. And that’s not even counting the acting. My god, the acting! Horrible dialogue gives birth to uneven performances, but it doesn’t necessitate accents that are all over the place or actors that sound like they’re reciting. Furthermore, the fact that nobody garners the least bit of sympathy, nobody is a convincing badass and absolutely nobody embodies an interesting character in any way, pulls the film down to simply being boring and unengaging.
Romero fucks up his film even further by employing cheap CGI and uninspired and misplaced humor, rendering the end result one of the uttermost uninspired crapfests I’ve ever experienced. Survival of The Dead goes beyond bad, because of it’s context, though. I mean, this guy used to pack a punch, we all know that! So what the fuck happened!? I still don’t know who or what to blame for the collective downfall of my teenage icons, but I know that in George Romero the fallen ones just got a new bunkmate. I haven’t felt this ridiculed since watching the shitpiles of his contemporaries as mentioned above. You have broken my heart George Romero, and I never thought I’d be saying that to a 70-year old man.
Rating: 1/5 Skulls
Screened at CPH:PIX 2010
The 30th edition of the Fantasia International Film Festival commences this week in Montreal, running from July 16 through August 2. It’s set to unleash 125 features and 200+ shorts, from new premieres to festival favorites.
That includes screenings of upcoming theatrical releases Buddy, Colony, Her Private Hell, Hot Spot, and Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma, as well as retrospective screenings of Pontypool and Gozu. But so much of the fun of Fantasia is the new film discoveries and surprises, and this year’s fest comes packed with potential.
Here are eight horror movies to keep an eye out for at this year’s fest.
Big Break
New York’s cult comedy darlings Simple Town are carving their way into horror with this comedic feature. In Big Break, Will (Will Niedmann), Caroline (Caro Yost), and Felipe (Felipe Di Poi Tamargo, Blood Barn) reunite with their estranged ex-collaborator Sam (Samuel Lanier) years after their sketch group disbanded, hoping to get in his good graces to appear in the sequel of his hit film. But dark secrets are exposed during their weekend getaway, forcing these washed-up comedians to learn what it really means to kill to get their big break. Art imitating life in a witty horror-comedy sounds like a blast.
Corpus
An invite to a secluded party with his longtime crush and rising film star instead unfurls a strange nightmare of sensual and supernatural proportions. Corrin Evans’ feature debut is set in the summer of 1998, capturing a stylish, transgressive web of seduction and terror. The film stars Jeff Wahlberg (“Euphoria”), Brodie Townsend (“Heartbreak High”), Michael Vlamis (“Pools”), Lily Cowles (Antebellum), Nuha Jes Izman (“Yellowjackets”) and Ching Valdes-Aran (The Equalizer).
Freaks Part II
Final Destination Bloodlines filmmakers Zach Lipovsky & Adam Stein return to their mutant roots with their follow-up to 2018’s Freaks. Picking up several years later, Mary (Amanda Crew, Freaks) and her daughter Chloe (Lorelei Olivia Mote, Riddle of Fire) are on the run from authorities, masking their superpowered abilities and identities. But revenge will complicate matters in a sequel that teases a severe escalation in bloodshed. The Conjuring‘s Lili Taylor also stars.
Junction Row
Canadian horror icon Katharine Isabelle stars as Juno, a recovering addict who leaves a fringe housing compound for a better life, leaving her beloved Ruby behind. When she learns Ruby has gone missing, she discovers Junction Row has been overrun with criminals and something far more horrifying. The creature feature marks the feature debut of director Ashlea Wessel, who co-writes Junction Row with Clown in a Cornfield author Adam Cesare and Matt Serafini.
The Last Temptation of Becky
Becky Hooper (Lulu Wilson) escalates her ultra-violent annihilation of Neo-Nazis with a new CIA mission that sends her to Poland to infiltrate a family of innkeepers who are running a tourist venture at The Wolf’s Lair, Hitler’s WWII bunker. To prevent the Fourth Reich, Becky takes matters into her own bloody hands. Jenn Wexler (The Sacrifice Game, The Ranger) directs this trilogy capper from a script she co-wrote with Matt Angel (The Wrath of Becky), from a story by Angel andSuzanne Coote (The Wrath of Becky). Neil Patrick Harris also stars.
Los Vampires
Lost actor Henry Ian Cusick and Spectre actor Thomas Kretschmann lead as uncanny surrogates for Carlos Villarías and Bela Lugosi in this fantastical fictionalized account of the making of George Melford’s classic horror film, one that was shot overnight on the same sets as Tod Browning’s Dracula. The period horror movie is written and directed by Craig Mitchell (Komodo). Daniela Couso (Serial Beauty), Jefferson Mays (Inherent Vice), Oscar Nuñez (“The Office”), and Jorge Diaz (Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones) round out the cast. Watch the intriguing teaser here.
Rubberhead: The Life & Monsters of Steve Johnson
The wild life and incredible career of SFX wizard Steve Johnson (Fright Night, Poltergeist II, An American Werewolf in London, A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master) gets the documentary spotlight from director Nick Taylor. Those familiar with Johnson’s two-book saga Rubberhead: Sex, Drugs and Special FX, which serves as the basis for the documentary, will already know that the artist is a candid raconteur as open about his failures as his successes. Linnea Quigley, John Landis, Tom Holland, and Oscar-winner Bill Corso also contribute as talking heads in this illuminating doc.
Unholy Night
Grandma is back from the dead and ready to commit murder in this holiday horror comedy from writer/director Michael Gabriele. The chaos of an Italian Christmas Eve gets dialed up to a zany, violent degree in the first teaser. Marc Bendavid (“Dark Matter”), Shailene Garnett (“Shadowhunters”), Al Sapienza (“The Sopranos”), Ron Lea (“Orphan Black”), Toni Ellwand (“Hannibal”), Cristina Rosato (Mother!), Jacqueline Robbins (“A Series of Unfortunate Events”), and Joe Pingue (Antiviral) star.
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