AHHH! Remakes! I'm shitting myself with fanboy rage as I continue to UTTERLY FAIL to comprehend that remakes have been around since the earliest days of cinema, and will continue for as long as they make money. Man, if only businesses would do things purely to satisfy me, instead of doing them to make a profit! I mean, what the hell kind of greedy jerks actually want their movies to make money so badly that they would dare to tap an existing property with proven name value that's sitting around unused?!?!? What selfish douchebags! I think all remakes, sequels, homages, movies inspired by other movies and plays, movies adapted from novels and comic books, and any other film that isn't 100% wholly original in every sense of the word should be banned forever! That way, no movies would ever come out, and unnecessary remakes would stop coming along and wiping the classic originals from existence, creating a permanent barrier that keeps new generations of film lovers from ever seeing or enjoying those classics. And while I'm at it, fuck anyone under the age of 17 if he or she wants to see a scary movie in theaters! They can go fuck themselves, because it just isn't fair to us adults to have to wait for the DVD releases to see unrated, gorier versions of horror films! No movie can ever be scary without buckets of viscera and dozens of bare tits in every other scene. No movie that isn't at least rated R is worth a steaming pile of monkey shit, or deserves to be called a "horror movie". I mean, the original POLTERGEIST was PG, and look how un-scary it was... Oh, wait.