Today we've got your Horror In Your House for this upcoming Tuessday, May 6, 2008. Although Brain Damage continues to unload piles and piles of crap, there are some gems hiding in the rough. Do a little digging and you'll find Dimension Extreme's Teeth, which played at the Sundance Film Festival in 2007. Read on to see what else arrives this week.
Horror In Your House
May 6, 2008
By: Tex Massacre
BLOODSUCKING BABES FROM BURBANK: Brain Damage
Passionate archeology students unearth a cursed jewel box in the Burbank Mountains, which turns girls into bloodthirsty cannibals and their boyfriends into dinner. Girls turn into shameless cannibals on the street, at the beach and even in a Burbank bar. A mysterious drifter with a secret and the girl he loves set out to destroy the relic before time runs out... but it s not as easy as they think.
THE CAR: Universal
The peaceful tranquility of a small Western town is disturbed when a murderous car wreaks havoc by viciously mowing down innocent victims. New sheriff, Wade Parent, may be the only one who can stop this menace in its tracks until he realizes that the driver of this indestructible vehicle is far more dangerous than any man… it is driven by pure evil.
Tex Says: Grindhouse glory comes back to DVD with a Universal re-issue of this great James Brolin flick. Check it out if you didn’t get your hands on the old Anchor Bay release.
THE FEARMAKERS: Phoenix
Sammy and Tom are paranormal investigators, trying to solve a case that has haunted Tom for years. Every year, he comes to Germany – and every year, he leaves empty-handed. This year, however, they run into Donnie, an old friend who informs them of an unsolved mystery that’s right up their alley. Donnie’s American friend Sarah has been having nightmares. Her sister was brutally murdered and voices from beyond have drawn her to Germany, where she believes the answers must lie. Teaming up with Sammy and Tom, the group tries to seek out answers to the murder – and the ghoulish deaths that are befalling citizens of this small German town. The people here know more than they let on… and no one can be trusted.
FRIGHTWORLD: Brain Damage
Frightworld, a horror themed amusement park that has been shut down for decades, is about to be re-opened. To celebrate, the new owner, his girlfriend and their friends throw a party on the park grounds. The party gets a little bit out of hand and blood gets shed; resurrecting sadistic serial killer Verden Fell. Verden takes possession of the group one by one and uses their bodies as a vessel to carry out his bloody killings.
Tex Says: Debbie Rochon and friends get together to give director Timo Rose (the MUTATION series) a cast in this ghost story!
GRIZZLY RAGE: Genius
When a group of high school grads accidentally hit a bear cub with their car, they soon come face-to-face with their worst nightmare: a massive mother Grizzly hell-bent on revenge. With no cell phones, no weapons, no light and only tension mounting, all the students have are their wits, a prayer, and each other.
Tex Says: The Maneater Series returns with more vapid people meeting more vicious predators. David DeCoteau (BROTHERHOOD) gets behind the lens on this one, which is better than most of the other films in the series, but still seriously lacking.
KILL THE SCREAM QUEEN: Brain Damage
Inspired by real experiences of girls who had responded to ads that seemed legitimate, but ended up being nothing more than a pervert s scam, Kill the Scream Queen follows a movie maker who posts ads on the internet for girls to be in a snuff film.
KINKY CANNIBAL DOUBLE FEATURE (CANNIBAL DOCTOR, DINNER FOR TWO; 2-disc special edition): Seduction Cinema/POPcinema
CANNIBAL DOCTOR (1999)—A doctor and his wife are looking to consume a tender girl in order to stay young forever. Enter Michelle—naïve to the point of dimwitted—who comes in to the doc s office seeking a job and is persuaded into undergoing a check-up prior to being employed as a secretary.
DINNER FOR TWO (2000)—In this sequel remake, Misty Mundae plays her own sister, who is the main entrée that is tenderized and tickled at length before being massaged, oiled and cooked for the delight of Dr. Ben Orange and his wife.
Tex Says: More Misty Mundae action than you can shake your….at. This is a pair of classic re-issues from the old William Hellfire, Factory 2000 days!
MERCY: Unearthed
After serving twenty-five years for committing a mysterious and violent crime, John is released from prison. Unfortunately, the first human contact he has is with a maniacal parole officer. John s later experience with a condescending new landlord isn t so great either, and together these encounters effectively establish the bleak and miserable tone that seems to characterize his life on the outside. Nevertheless, John works to establish a routine as a way to counter his guilt and achieve a sense of normalcy. However, he soon loses his way when a would-be actress awakens certain deeply suppressed desires. These desires, in turn, trigger eerie hallucinations and disturbing nightmares that recall a criminal past best forgotten.
Tex Says: Very David Lynch for those of you who dig that sorta stuff. I do, and I definitely thought the performances in this psychological horror drama made up for any budget and screenplay inadequacies.
TEETH: Dimension Extreme/Genius (TEX’S PICK OF THE WEEK)
Dawn is a pretty but prim high school virgin who unknowingly has a set of mutant teeth between her legs. When a supposedly likeminded boyfriend forces himself upon her, Dawn's vagina dentata start chomping!
Tex Says: Ouch! OK, seriously, this is my pick of the week ‘cause the film is insanely awesome.
TO BECOME ONE: Brain Damage
One by one, all of Melinda's friends and family are being murdered. When kidnapped, she learns the horrific truth: Doctor Hatcher, a psychotic, deranged scientist, plans to perform his ultimate sadistic masterpiece the physical splicing of a man and a woman together, to become one.
ZA—ZOMBIES ANONYMOUS (a.k.a. LAST RITES OF THE DEAD): Well Go USA
Angela is shot point blank by her boyfriend Josh and lives In a world where the living and the dead co-exist people continuously find ways to cope and look for answers. Zombie Anonymous meetings look alive face creams all meat diners help the mortally challenged find their way in this bizarre society. ZA takes you on an unforgettable ride where life meets death or does it?
I saw Teeth last night and really enjoyed it! My only complaint is it just didn't seem that "extreme" to be a Dimension Extreme release. Besides a few VERY BRIEF bloody shots, there wasn't anything extreme...hell, we didn't even get to see the actual toothy creature on camera! At least not the version I saw...is there an unrated version? Anyways, toothy vagina appearance or not, the movie was still lots of fun (in a painful squirmy way!)
Best Buy in Kansas already had Frontier(s) out on the 6th, bought my copy last night.
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Passionate archeology students unearth a cursed jewel box in the Burbank Mountains, which turns girls into bloodthirsty cannibals and their boyfriends into dinner. Girls turn into shameless cannibals on the street, at the beach and even in a Burbank bar. A mysterious drifter with a secret and the girl he loves set out to destroy the relic before time runs out... but it s not as easy as they think.
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