When it comes to the whole gimmick of “holiday horror”, it’s really hit and miss. Mostly miss. Let’s face it—Halloween and Friday the 13th got it right, but outside of those classics, it’s quite a dismal little subgenre. Don’t believe me? Then let’s relive some of it’s less-than-memorable followers, shall we?
The 10 Lamest Days of Horror the World Has Ever Known
It might be high-profile now thanks to the shiny new remake, but the original version was basically the Shemp of slasher movies. Two years after striking gold as Laurie Strode, Jamie Lee Curtis tried to recapture lightning in a bottle with this afterthought. Still, I do wish Leslie Neilsen was my high school principal.
9.ThanXgiving (2007)
No, I’m not talking about the Eli Roth trailer. That was actually quite awesome. Didn’t know there was actual Thanksgiving horror movie that came out (straight to DVD) last year? Well, consider yourself among the lucky ones. Even a starring turn from Ari Lehman, a.k.a. the guy who played Jason Voorhees at the end of the first Friday the 13th, isn’t enough to make this one interesting.
8. Don’t Open ‘Til Christmas (1984)
You would think that a movie with the tagline “’Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring…they were all dead!” would be awesome. You would be wrong. From the folks who brought us 1980’s Slaughter High came this tale of a serial killer hunting guys dressed as Santa. If only the filmmakers had been dressed that way.
7. My Bloody Valentine (1981)
This decidedly average affair was Paramount’s attempt to follow-up on Friday the 13th before they realized the better follow-up strategy would be to make endless sequels to it. The latest entry on the remake slate, the original centers on an urban legend about a stalker who murders lovers on Valentine’s Day. Oh, the bittersweet irony. Yawn.
6. Saturday the 14th (1981)
Long before Scary Movie, there was this impotent fright flick. Not even the great Jeffrey Tambor as the vampire Waldemar could save the nearly laugh-free goings-on in this movie about a family that moves into a house full of monsters. Makes the Wayans brothers seem like Woody Allen.
5. Memorial Day (1999)
At this point, it’s almost a shock that there was never a horror movie called Arbor Day (hopefully no producers are reading this). In this originality-challenged endeavor, a masked killer picks off a bunch of teenagers on a weekend getaway. By a lake. Hmmm.
4. New Year’s Evil (1980)
Other than the fact that my esteemed fellow horror blogger BC took his blog’s logo from this movie’s poster, nothing good has ever come from it. When a killer threatens to bump off women in advancing time zones as the clock strikes midnight on New Year’s Eve, what can anyone do? Change the channel.
3. April Fool’s Day (1986)
At first, you’re not really sure if the murders are real or parts of an elaborate prank in this slasher flick with a twist. Unfortunately, you don’t care either way. Gotta love the chick with the noose hair braid on the video box cover, and a supporting role for Thomas “Biff from Back to the Future” Wilson, but that’s about it.
2. Happy Birthday to Me (1981)
Everyone remembers the famous shish-kabob-through-the-throat gag, but does that really make this one worth seeing? Classy actor Glenn Ford was cast in an effort to give this flick a more high-brow flavor than most other slasher entries, which is exactly why he was cast as Clark Kent’s dad in Superman: The Movie. Well, at least it worked once.
and the lamest day of horror the world has ever known…
1. Mother’s Day (1980)
Kind of a cross between The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and I Spit on Your Grave, except missing all the powerful filmmaking of the former and the raw shock value of the latter. Let this piece of exploitation trash be a reminder to us all that it takes more than just randomly throwing together offensive themes and images to make an effective horror movie. Besides, the actual Mother’s day is usually horrific enough. Do we really need to make a movie about it?
For more news and opinions on the world of horror, including the final part of The History of Horror and a look at the work of H.P. Lovecraft, check out Brian’s daily blog, The Vault of Horror, at thevaultofhorror.net.
Can agree on all but April's Fools Day,which is to me anyway a highly underrated,entertaining and relatively early mockup of the slasher genre.
Swap that with Silent Night,Deadly Night and the list is fine.
I actually think "happy birthday to Me was" was good, but then again I was a kid when it came out, the shish kabo it just classic...
But actually "Saturday the 14th" was the biggest piece of crap i put on my vhs, it was the comedy that made you wish everybody in it died a horrible death right away, that should be the Number 1 on the list....
lets take 2,3,6,7,8, and 10 off the list. And, maybe, stop making lists for the sake of grouping themed horror movies together. That, or, pick movies that actually sucked if you're going to title it "Lamest".
Like, To All a Good Night, Graduation Day, Bloody New Year, Valentine or even the April Fools Day Remake. Holy crap what a terrible movie.
While I appreciate the nod to Horror Movie A Day, I cannot condone the slamming of My Bloody Valentine!!! Valentine I'll give you, but MBV is far and away one of the best slashers of the period, and still holds up. I also dig Mother's Day and April Fool's Day (original)... the remake for AFD should be on here (and possibly number 1).
Never heard of Thanxgiving tho... gotta check that out :)
I think the original April Fool's Day worked. If it hadn't, I don't think they would've bothered with a remake.
LOLLL I knew Sat the 14th would be on here!
Yeah, this list is another "Here are all the similar-themed films I could remember!" exercise. To compare MOTHER'S DAY to I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE is to completely miss the twisted humor of the former and the genuine sociopathic pornography of the latter. APRIL FOOL'S DAY may have been a prnak of a movie, but it's an enjoyable one. I agree that HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME is not worthy of its reputation, but MY BLOODY VALENTINE isn't bad at all. As others have noted, you left out GRADUATION DAY, FINAL EXAM (which is centered around a single day), SILENT NIGHT DEADLY NIGHT (and numerous other X-Mas-themed turds), and countless direct-to-video stinkers. Worse, you chose not to include remakes, meaning that in your humble estimation, the BLACK CHRISTMAS remake is better than all of the films listed here, and the APRIL FOOL'S DAY remake is better than the original. A little research and a little perspective could make these lists MUCH better.
agree with the statements that prom night, mothers day, my bloody, and april fools do not belong on this list! Equinox belongs here- even though it is the original Evil Dead. The Gaint Claw belongs on this list- cause it's horribly awesome!
Remove Aprils Fool's Day (1986) from this list and replace it with the day Bloody-Disgusting pushed the "indie" horror movies off into that bastard red-headed stepchild section.
Equinox could be a day and or event. Getting the Munchies is an Event too. Murder Set pieces sucks so bad it should be on every bad horror movie list. People who have watched it should get a refun and a day off from work as compensation. The Gaint Claw- if it really happend would eventually become a memorial day, cause the Giant Claw would the biggest world disaster in the histroy of Worlds with Disasters.---------- Don't blame me man. I don't read the threads. I just post in them....
only seen april foods day out of the mix so i cant really judge on the other films but happy bday to me is i think in my line of netflix movies to rent. i liked april foods day 1980. the remake of it will prob suck.
well, considering who picked out the movies for this list, it is not that shocking. we all like different movies, I enjoyed quite a few of the movies on this list and own them. AFD, MBV, HBTM and Prom Night. Sorry, but no matter whom thinks these movies suck, they are truly classics compared to many of todays horror movies that BD boasts about being so good.....
people don't understand that these r someones opinion. my god people do yourselves a favor and think. Chill out. Everyone has their opinions, and that is what makes america great. If you don't like something then u don't have too read it. I for one am glad that he can post what he wants. Let this guy decide what he likes and u decide what u like, but please don't bash him for stating what he feels about these films.
-Heather
RE: My Bloody Valentine being a decidedly average affair.
Who decided? Are you saying it was purposely made to be average? Nearly thirty years later, MBV is one of the best slasher films of all time. It's well shot, suspenseful and a damn fine piece of entertainment.
Also, I long for the day when people realize that Prom Night isn't that bad at all.
These lists are lame. Why would Bloody-Disgusting, a site aimed at horror movies for fans, want to group 10 horror films together and proceed to tell us readers how horrible they are? If it weren't for these kinds of movies, your little fansite wouldn't be running today, filling us with "awesome" info on Repo!
Between this list and your glowing review of Automaton Transfusion, I will never listen to another single fucking thing anyone on this site says about anything.
I agree with almost the whole list with the exception of April fools day (1986). It doesnt belong on this list. Sure, its goofy but in an entertaining way. I think it should be replaced with the remake AFD (2008). That film is not only bad, it should be placed at no.1 in this list.
And more about My Bloody Valentine: "This decidedly average affair was Paramount’s attempt to follow-up on Friday the 13th before they realized the better follow-up strategy would be to make endless sequels to it." What the author of this article fails to understand is that Friday the 13th, My Bloody Valentine and several of the F13 sequels were made independently of the studio. They were small, independent films that Paramount picked up for distribution only. So when Solomon writes something asinine about Paramount's 'attempt', it's frustrating because he obviously doesn't know what he's talking about. And horror fans know this. So please do a little bit of research next time you try and write a snarky, pseudo-comic top ten list. It's not terribly amusing and only makes you look like a poser.
woah, this is the first time ive almost completly disagreed with one of the top 10 lists.
i liked most of those movies on there (im still not going to say that they were good but they wernt the worst)
also on Don’t Open ‘Til Christmas they made a mistake. it says 1980's slaughter high when slaughter high was made in 1986.
Well now; I actually liked the movie Mother's Day but it was 15 years ago when I saw it last. So mabey it did suck.. I don't know. I remember April Fool's Day and My Bloody Valentine being OK too. The original Prom Night is pretty good but fuck that remake that is coming out. Piss on it too.
YET AGEAN YOU ASSHOLES HAVE NO SENCE OF GOOD HORROR MOVIES PROM NIGHT & APRIL FOOLS DAY(1986) SHOULD NOT BE IN THERE ADD APRIL FOOLS DAY(2008) AND FRIDAY THE 13th ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You know, please take the originals off the list and replace them with the remakes [most of the remakes suck over the past 5 years have f'n sucked!!] because they were what influenced a generation of horror fans [thank gawd nobody is remaking FADE TO BLACK because that classic movie still holds up today]!!!!
~(^)~
True most of the plots were lame, but they were good films and still are. One thing though, and I'm not saying it doesn't belong on a Worst/Lame List, but I still remember watching Saturday the 14th with my Dad and laughing till we cried, so I have soft spot in my heart for that one! : p
Half of this list is bullshit. Mother's Day, April Fool's Day, Happy Birthday to Me, and My Bloody Valentine shouldn't be on this list. All are great. Prom Night is average and not all that bad although most people seem to hate it.
Just a quick note: If memory serves in the BLOB remake, some characters are in a movie theatre watching (I believe) a film entitled: Arbor Day Massacre. So, in a movie-within-a-movie sort of way, your horrible-holiday-themed-horror films list is complete.
No Black Christmas??? Well, It IS on the List of the top 15 worst horror remakes, but the fact that its a holiday themed horror flick warrants its inclusion. Not to mention the fact that It sucked twice as hard as the average slasher flick, so.. um, yeah. I had a point, but now I forgot what it was....
Oh, come on! 'My Bloody Valentine' was one of the best slashers of the 1980s. I'd rank it, along with 'The Burning' as better than Friday the 13th.
And 'April Fools Days' was fine until the ending, where upon you realize it wasn't really a slasher film.
If you want the name of a horrible holiday-themed slasher film, how about replacing 'My Bloody Valentine' with 'Silent Night, Deadly Night 3'? Now there's a horrible slasher film!
Ummm...what the hell kind of list is this??? Why are you telling horror fans that their favorite horror films suck? This was the meanest, most arrogant thing I have read on this site yet.
Did not mind Happy Birthday to Me, but I did watch that years ago. Although you have replaced that with Bloddy Birthday.
The list is way to long though to properly narrow down to just 10.
Remake of Prom Night, remake of April Fools Day and remake of Black Christmas and the list would've been worth something. A lot of good movies are on that list(Happy Birthday To Me, April Fools Day, My Bloody Valentine). WTF?
Happy Birthday to Me was fine. It starred one of the girls from Little House on the Prarie... that's hot!
April Fools Day as a spoof is great, but trying being 10 years old and not realizing they were goofing on the genre. Then imagine you like the movie anyway.
Promnight was boring as all get out. Then again I did watch after snorting ten pixie sticks... anything could be boring with that much sugar in your system.
I must say this is the WORST list of "bad movies" compiled by "horror fans" I have EVER seen! That's no small feat!. I know now to disregard your sites opinions on the internet, in magazines and emblazened across the covers of now-suspect films.
I Would also like to know why Graduation Day was excluded from the list? While I find it totally rad ( Christopher George + Linnea Quigley + Vanna White w/ a side of the memorable music of Felony = 80's slasher perfection!), it's certainly more of a dog than 4 movies in your list. It seems apparent most of us know which those are.
Wow...this list is shockingly bad for this website. A really surprising drop in quality all for the sake of throwing together 10 holiday themed movies. Why not just do a list of holiday themed movies and leave it at that rather than pretending that films suck simply because of the theme.
Very disappointing...
"My Bloody Valentine" is a classic slasher flick and dosent need to be on the same list with this junk. "New Years Evil" was'nt a classic, but it was still a cool movie. and "Mother's Day" was low-budget, but it too was a pretty good movie. It's just as sick and twisted as some of this torture porn tha is out today.
Well some people would argue that some of theses movies are considered classic to the 80's slasher era...
Promnight
My Bloody Valintine - filmed in NS canada too..lol
Mothers Day
April Fools Day
Happy Birthday to me
all were part of my intro to horror so i have a special place for them...agreed they were not the best..but the 80;s was a strange time...lol
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