Monday, March 24, 2008
By: Tex Massacre
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Another fantastic Horror In Your House as this week's DVD release list is massive and loaded with fiber. Not only is Frank Darabont's THE MIST hitting retailers, but you can now pick up THEM, SHROOMS and even the horrid APRIL FOOL'S DAY, which I recommend avoiding at all costs. Read on for the full list.
Horror in your House
March 25, 2008
By: Tex Massacre
APRIL FOOL'S DAY (2008): Sony Pictures
Each April Fool's Day, fabulously wealthy young Desiree Cartier hosts the most killer coming-out parties at her to-die-for southern mansion. And this social event is never complete without one of her patented pranks. But when this year's joke turns deadly, Desiree, her brother Blaine and five of their friends all become the targets of a twisted killer who begins hunting them down one by one in this chilling tale of seduction, betrayal and revenge.
TEX SAYS: How come our favorite horror films already suffering the indignity of being remade, are also being deposited in to Direct-to-Video hell? If everyone already knew the films were gonna blow, don’t you think they would have just NOT re-made them. Sheesh!
BLUE EYES OF THE BROKEN DOLL (a.k.a. HOUSE OF PSYCHOTIC WOMEN; special edition): Deimos/BCI Eclipse
An ex-convict, troubled by dreams that he strangles women, is hired as the caretaker on an estate owned by three very strange sisters. Soon after his arrival, a serial killer begins slaughtering blonde, blue-eyed women - leaving their eyeballs in a bowl of water.
THE DRACULA SAGA: Deimos/BCI Eclipse
Count Dracula's pregnant granddaughter arrives at his castle, along with her husband. While she prepares to give birth to a new member of the Dracula family, her husband secretly begins a series of affairs with the Count's brides.
FINGERPRINTS: Image
In this terrifying supernatural thriller, a troubled teenager sets out on a grisly path to discover the disturbing truth behind a well-known urban legend. Haunted for fifty years by the horrifying tale of a train colliding with a school bus, killing all the children aboard, the small town left behind continues to suffer as a stomach-churning chain of murders claims victim after victim.
THE HAUNTING OF REBECCA VERLAINE: MTI
On an idyllic Christmas evening, all members of the Verlaine Commune are brutally massacred by a mysterious killer. The only survivor of the tragedy is Verlaine's young daughter Rebecca, who is seriously wounded and falls into a long coma.
Two years later, she awakes but her mind has blocked all past memories. Adopted by her aunt and uncle and thinking them to be her parents, the horrible truth is kept from her. Ten years later, just when Rebecca thinks her life is wonderful and she seemingly has the perfect relationship, strange visions begin to haunt her as the dead are seeking revenge.
HUMAN BEASTS: Deimos/BCI Eclipse
Paul Naschy stars as a mercenary who double-crosses his partner/girlfriend Meiko and gets shot for his troubles. Failing unconscious, he is taken in by a wealthy doctor who has two beautiful daughters. His recuperation is slow, and in the meantime he is seduced by daughters and apparently haunted by the ghost of their mother. Strange things are going on at the house and if he is going to survive the night, he'll have to escape the house.
THE LIVING AND THE DEAD: TLA
With bankruptcy looming, desperate Donald Brocklebank must leave his bedridden wife alone with their son James - a schizophrenic man-child. In a horrific fit of dementia James abandons his medication, locks the doors, and plays nurse. As his ability to distinguish morbid fantasy from reality decays, he plunges into a mental labyrinth so violent and deranged none of them may survive it.
LOST HIGHWAY: Universal
Haunting sexuality, ricochet action and fleeting, murderous shadows await you on a journey that begins and ends on the Lost Highway. The successful jazz musician whose marriage is on the rocks. The man in black who threatens to expose him. The young mechanic with links to a powerful mobster. The mobster's moll, who knows what she wants and the people who can get it for her. These are the riders on the Lost Highway, trapped in their worlds of desire, destiny, and unknown destination, where the truth is always just a short way further down the road.
TEX SAYS: Technically not a horror film, but damn, I’ve been waiting for this David Lynch masterpiece for so long, I’ve forgotten what it was even about—or perhaps I never understood it to begin with—what a quandary. This only misses my PICK OF THE WEEK because I couldn’t pass up on…
THE MIST: Weinstein Co./Genius (TEX’S PICK OF THE WEEK)
A mysterious mist, thick with blood-thirsty creatures, descends on a small town, where a group of people holes up in a grocery store to fight for their lives.
TEX SAYS: Hard to believe a bunch of people trapped in a grocery store but a random meteorological event could be so cool. I guess John Carpenter already proved that once. Check out the Black and White version of the film on the DVD…it’s must see!
SHROOMS (special edition): Magnolia
Keen for adventure, a group of American teenagers come to Ireland, having been promised the trip of a lifetime by their Irish friend, Jake, a mushroom expert. But the vacation takes a horrible turn when the teenagers ignore Jake’s warnings and ingest the local shrooms. Before long, the panicked friends are stalked by ghostly creatures. Are these hallucinations - or gruesome reality?
TEX SAYS: See what BC has to say about the motive in this film, but oops…it contains a spoiler. For my money, this is the dopiest premise for a film yet…dopiest…get it.
THE SISTER OF URSULA (special edition): Severin
Severin Films presents an infamous slice of EuroSleaze that repeatedly thrusts at the abyss of bad taste. In the wake of their father's death, two beautiful sisters - sensitive Ursula and promiscuous Dagmar - come to a seaside resort for a relaxing vacation. But their idyllic getaway will soon become a depraved nightmare of kinky exhibitionists, dope-sick lotharios, lust-crazed lesbians and a psychotic killer who tears women to pieces with - no kidding - a phallus of massive proportion.
THEM (ILS; special edition): Dark Sky
A young couple lead a happy, quiet life in the countryside. But little do they know they're being surrounded. When night falls, the couple will come face to face with THEM. Who are they? What do they want? The answers will take them to the very limits of fear itself.
TEX SAYS: If you think that the fog in THE MIST is an intangible terror, imagine a film where the scariest think is the soundtrack. THEM deliver thrills and chills but doesn’t reveal anything until seconds before the closing credits. Score one more the French!
THE TORTURE CHAMBER OF DR. SADISM/DEATH SMILES ON A MURDERER (special edition): Legend House
THE TORTURE CHAMBER OF DR. SADISM (1967) Christopher Lee stars at Count Regula, who is drawn and quartered for killing twelve virgins in his dungeon torture chamber. Thirty-five years later, he comes back to seek revenge on the daughter of his intended thirteenth victim and the son of his prosecutor in order to attain immortal life.
DEATH SMILES ON A MURDERER (1973) A bizarre and stylish mixture of necrophilia, sexual obsession and gore. A rich couple takes in a young girl who was in an accident and has amnesia, and both have an affair with her. Meanwhile, a doctor uses an ancient Incan formula to raise the dead for his own series of revenge murders.
THE UNDERTOW (special edition): SRS Cinema
Six friends enter the strange town of Old Mines for a weekend float trip.They quickly realize that the town is not friendly to strangers, and they are pressured to leave by the police. When the friends decide to continue their float trip anyway, terrifying secrets of the town surface. A seven-foot-tall deformed maniac, known by the townsfolk as ?The Boy? is kept under lock and key by the town?s mayor. The Boy?s purpose is simple: kill outsiders. The Mayor of Old Mines releases The Boy and the maniac's hunt begins. One by one, the campers on their float trip are ripped to gory shreds by the enraged, deformed, hulking Boy. But there is great mystery to The Boy. Who is his father? Who is his mother? How did he become so dangerous? In the end, the answers to these questions will put the entire town of Old Mines in danger. The Boy is an unstoppable killing machine, and anyone in his path won't be in one piece for long.
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I'm for sure picking up The Mist. |
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