In the wild wild world of direct to video marketing, one of the most dangerous traps that unwitting viewers fall victim to is the sleek coverbox scam. I can scarcely count the number of instances over the years where some very cool cover art secretly masked the nightmarishly pedestrian nature of the actual product concealed within.

Motor Home Massacre is just such an animal - a microbudget film playing big boy games thanks to some solid skills in the huckster department. But don’t be fooled kiddies. That Chainsaw on the cover that draws your eyes in like flies feasting on a rotted corpse is nothing more than fanboy fantasy. A promise to whet your appetite for a fest of shredded teenage flesh. But, Motor Home Massacre is more movie of the “weak” than kin to the slash and thrash opuses of Tobe Hooper and William Lustig.

A group of teens (insert audible yawn), hellbent on a weekend of carnal delight, set out in a vintage RV to sate the most basics of fratboy instincts….the weekend road trip En route to a remote campsite they encounter a creepy gas station attendant who warns them of a recent spat of killings in the area. Not to be put off by a little post Friday the 13th camper killer, our intrepid group of walking meat puppets head right back out on their merry path to oblivion. But, once our crew arrives at their (say it with me now) final destination, they discover first hand that the things that go bump in the night often do so with a barrage of bladed instruments.

Just keep repeating to yourself…what’s important here is not who lives or dies, but how many tattered torsos and topless teens are on display.

Going right off the bat for a tongue-in-cheap approach to a well worn horror path, director Allen Wilbanks overarches the comic timing and misses the boat on a RV-load of opportunities to terrify the audience, making Motor Home Massacre look less like a coherent fright film and more like a weekend showing of bland home movies.

The DVD features a behind the scenes Q&A gallery that virtually approximates the exact failings of the film. As the camera wanders aimlessly from cast member to crewmember, each attempts to offer some witty remarks about the production. In the end, this piece is overlong and seriously lacking in comic material. The same can be said about the film, clocking in at 88 minutes. This flick should have been a breeze, but it’s so damn disjointed it feels almost as long as my last camping trip. It also doesn’t help that Wilbanks pads the film out by focusing on the initial murder twice - offering both the killers perspective as well as the victims. Frankly that might have worked, if the murder was even remotely spectacular – but the day-glo blood was so jarring, I almost fell off the couch in a fit of hysterics. A word to the wise, miscalculated humor tends to illustrate a flaw in filmmaking.

So what’s the bottom line here, well, If your looking for a scary “into the woods” type of thriller, you’d do better to skip the spread that Motor Home Massacre is serving and step out into your backyard. But, if you’ve got a few drinking buddies hanging around with nothing better to do, the juvenile humor and tube-topped tarts should provide you with a solid 15 minutes of entertainment – provided you have already consumed a sufficient amount of Alcohol.