Zohan, a panda and Mickey Mouse walk into a bar...
10:17am, June 6, 2008
I had the absolute displeasure of watching You Don't Mess With The Zohan Tuesday night. I used to really look forward to anything with Apatow's name on the poster but lately, I've come to realize how much of a mixed bag his body of work is, whether he be writing, producing or directing.
Zohan is basically a Sandler version of Borat. Hell, Zohan even breaks out into "disco dance" every five minutes. Hummus jokes, up close crotch shots and dry humping overpower the film's attempt to be mix vulgar humor with social commentary (the "we're all the same" message is literally tacked onto the end).
About halfway through this movie, I think Sandler, Apatow and Smigel realized the stretchmarks on the character were beginning to show and they all of a sudden introduced this mall tycoon, Walbridge (Michael Buffer; Yes, the sports announcer), to give the movie an extra 20 minutes. And if that wasn't enough, Mariah Carey shows up as herself, for almost no reason at all, except for the filmmakers to say, "Hey, look who we got to show up in our film!" More importantly, we now have something to compare her performance in Glitter to. We're so lucky. Dave Matthews also shows up as a redneck hooligan, which probably isn't that much of a stretch for him.
I went into this film an Apatow fan and came out no longer excited for his untitled Sandler project that's coming out next year. I can honestly say that this film falls somewhere in my Top 20 worst films of all time list (I'm thinking somewhere around #15). I thought Drillbit Taylor was going to be as bad as it got for an Apatow flick but he sure proved me wrong. Thanks Judd!
Kung Fu Panda, surprisingly, wasn't half bad. Every child's film seems to have the "believe in yourself" and "don't judge a book by its cover" message tagged onto it but, in Panda's case, it hasn't been done this well in quite sometime.The animation is fluid, the fights are epic and reality defying and the obvious Bruce Lee homages are done with some tact.
But, the biggest compliment I can give the is film is that the normal Jack Black juvenile humor doesn't overpower the film. In fact, I can only think of a pee joke and one instance at the end that made me remember who was voicing the round and furry kung fu master-in-training.
Imagine that, a summer kid's flick was more mature than a tent pole comedy. Go figure.
Last weekend, I had a friend fly into town and we went to Disney and Universal. Disney was the same old, same old (I can't even remember the last time they put in a new ride... well, they did add two or three new rooms to the Haunted Mansion) so nothing to really report there. I did manage to eat one of those turkey legs for lunch though. Damn, those things are good. There's a rumor among the employees that they aren't really turkey legs... but ostrich with turkey flavoring injected into them. While it's probably not true, I really could care less if it was. Damn things are so good, I'd eat them anyway.
At Universal, we got to ride the Simpsons ride, which didn't open too long ago. The good news is it was better than I thought it would be and the actual building its in is decorated wonderfully. Standing in line wasn't that bad, since there is so much to watch and look at. The bad news is it makes me nostalgic for Back to the Future.
User Comments
 | MrDisgusting 1:40pm, June 6, 2008
BOOOOO I was excited |
 | Zeapups 7:11pm, June 7, 2008
dave matthews is not a redneck. :(. their music is really deep and a social commentary on injustices. |
 | Horrorholic 9:00pm, June 7, 2008
Dave should sing about the injustices he causes his fans. I payed $50 to see him and he stumbled out drunk and high and played the set in his pajamas. What a jip. |
 | Kamui_X 11:04pm, June 8, 2008
You paid $49.99 too much! |
 | KingOfHorror 7:22pm, July 19, 2008
I could tell By the Zohan Movie Poster this was gonna suck! |
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